School is crazy. It is driving me insane very slowly.

I am migrating my personal journal over to flinngillan and I think I am just going to use this one just for communities and whatnot. If you want to add me on there, please do.

Several professors have suggested that I switch my focus from General Lit to Creative Writing. I am trying to decide if I should do this or not. I have taken a lot of the general Lit classes, but I am really enjoying the creative writing class that I am taking right now. I guess I will just have to think about it.

Time for me to geek out a little!

Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist is being made into a movie with Kat Dennings and Michael Cera. Michael Cera is not how I imagined Nick, but I am sure he will totally rock the part. David Levithan and Rachel Cohn FTW!!!!

Chris Pine (the male romantic interest in The Princess Diaries 2) is currently in talks to star as James T. Kirk in J.J. Abrams' new Star Trek movie. Mike Vogel (Eric in Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants) was originally in talks for the role, so who knows what will happen. They are joining Zachary Quinto who is playing Spock. Zoe Saldana, yes, she of Center Stage fame, will be playing Uhura.

Not only that but they have cast Eric Bana as Nero the villain in Star Trek. I am sure ridiculously excited about this movie. I mean, come on, essentially the cast has now become a collection of walking orgasms. Plus.... it is Star Trek and I have a soft spot for Star Trek. Not as much as I love Star Wars, but I am still particularly fond of the series.

Also, Gossip Girl has been picked up for the full season. YES! Totally a guilty pleasure of mine and I am glad to see that it isn't going to get canceled.

Jerry O'Flaherty has been picked up to direct the CGI movie adaptation of Thundercats.  This is his first movie, but he served as art director on Gears of War, Unreal Tournament, and Command and Conquer (all video games, all pretty damn good video games). He has said that he is going to stay faithful to the original material and that makes me oh so happy cause I was worried that they would screw it up. Cheetara FTW!!!

Now all they need to do is make a Jonny Quest movie and my life will be complete.

Yahoo Exclusive Trailer for The Golden Compass. The quality is kind of wonky on my computer and I am trying to find a better version. BUT OMG PANSERBJORN FTW!!!!!

I just stood in the graveyard that inspired Buffy the Vampire Slayer. How awesome is that. Joss Whedon went to Wesleyan and his dorm room looked out over this small graveyard that is on campus. I just stood in it and took some pictures.

Okay, I am done geeking out.

Wednesday:
-Drove Home
- Finished Asian American Lit essay
- Made sure everything was packed.
- Played with cat.

Thursday:
- Woke up at 5am
- Got to the airport at 6:40 or so
- Sat around waiting for my flight to leave at 8:50
- Sat on plane next to nice man, who eventually fell asleep and snored, and in front of a little kid who kept kicking my seat.
    - I managed to read about 100 pages of the Star Wars novel that I brought with me.
- Arrived at LaGuardia at like 10:30 or so. Helped crazy old woman figure out where our baggage would be coming out.
- Got picked up by Thomas and taken to Middletown, Connecticut, home of Wesleyan University.
- Wandered around for a bit, took a nap, got food.
- Watched Blue Velvet, a truly weird film.
- Talked and hung out for a bit and then went to sleep

Friday:
- Woke up, Thomas went to class, I slept some more.
- Thomas came back from class and wants to sleep, so he is doing that.
- Think we might go pick apples later at some orchard, I am going to wander around campus and take pictures, I think he is going to introduce me to his advisor, the head of Special Collections, and get her to show me the signed first edition of Winnie The Pooh.
- Tonight, watching Transformers, with director, Michael Bay, who is a Wesleyan alumnus, so that will be pretty damn awesome.

Unless I have some sort of sentimental attachment to you, whether it be now or when we were in high school or whatever, everyone else has been deleted from being my facebook friend. I am about to do myspace soon. I dunno. I think everyone has that rush when they first get facebook to see just how many people they can add. I have people on there from highschool that I know never even spoke to me. So why keep them there? So they have been deleted.

YAY!!!!! I am leaving tomorrow morning to fly to New York and then getting picked up by the truly amazing Thoma(s) and going to Connecticut. What an awesome way to spend Fall Break. I will definitely update more as I do stuff.

According to the Today Show the "librarian look" is really stylish now and there were a lot of new designs at Fashion Week that were reminiscent of librarians. Go me! I am actually going to be all stylish and whatnot. HOT!

I am not sure what style I really fit into, I have been told that I dress like a librarian, or a little kid, or an indie kid. So I guess maybe it is a combination of all of those.

I am going to Connecticut/New York for my Fall Break. I am so so so excited. It will be quite fun.

So I do not like Kanye West at all. I think he is whiny and I believe his music is far overrated. Usually, I just ignore him and go on with my life. But driving back to Asheville on Sunday, I got stuck in traffic for an hour and a half outside of Greensboro. I was listening to the radio and ended up hearing his new song like twice. Now..... It made me sad because he samples from Daft Punk's "Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger" which I absolutely love. So I was greatly disappointed by that, but then I wanted to reach through the radio to punch him in the face when I heard the line "Now that don't kill me, can only makes us stronger"  (Or at least that is what it sounds like) I hate hate HATE bad and improper grammar in songs.

Plus.... he is just so damn annoying and thinks he is God's gift to mankind. GRR!

I am happy because Philip Pullman has a new book coming out coming out in April. It tells the story of how Iorek and Lee Scoresby first met. I AM SO EXCITED!

I have a big exam today in Queer Sociology and I feel woefully unprepared. I have studied but I still feel like I do not have a grasp on the information.

Ummm.... weird. I am sort of happy. It is a strange strange feeling.

Not sure who cares. But you are now able to download the pilot of GOSSIP GIRL on iTunes FREE. I have downloaded it and am watching it now. I am strangely excited.

In other news, I am currently lusting over the paperback copy of Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist with its amazing new cover. I just might buy a copy.....even though I have it in hardback.

I am now the proud owner of tickets to several concerts:
 - Rilo Kiley
 - Guster
 - The New Pornographers
 - Bright Eyes

And I am considering buying tickets to go see Hanson. Yes, Hanson. But I haven't decided on that yet.

I didn't get the job in the Finance office for some reason. Anyone have a job they want to give me? Or at least anyone have any suggestions for jobs?

Being sick sucks, but at least I have very understanding professors. I believe that Driggers likes me and that makes me happy. He is a great guy. Yay!

I think I am going home next weekend to see Melissa Walker do a reading from "Violet on the Runway" at the Regulator.

I really don't want to complain and I am sure not that many people really care.

So I will just say that I am quite *sadface* lately. Like.....incredibly *sadface*

That was quite possibly the easiest job interview ever. Pretty much, I just wandered around campus with this woman as she introduced me to people and they asked me a few times. It required that I repeat that I was interested in libraries and probably going to Grad School for Information and Library Sciences with a focus in Adolescent/Teen Services.

Glad that is over. She said that she has a few more people to talk to, but she also sort of made it seem like I had the job. So I guess we shall see where that goes. I need a job, that is for sure.

So Now I am in the library, writing this and getting ready to finish my Creative Writing work. Then who knows what I will do.

I have been having up and down days lately. I can manage alright, most of the time, but the pressure of school work and dealing with the breakup is tough. Mainly now it is keeping up with school and trying to piece together some sort of social life. I feel like I have been rather hermit-y lately, but I cannot really help that.

However, I do want to start having people come over for dinner or to just hang out or something like that.

So logically I know that I am okay and that things will be fine. I know this. I also know that it is better in the long-run. But still, at times I just hit a spot where it just hurts a lot and I don't really know how to deal with it. I am not entirely sure how I am feeling about things. Part of me still doesnt know why it happened, the other part of me understands completely.

How long am I allowed to wallow and feel bad about stuff? I have been trying to just pretend that everything is okay and hope that I can convince myself of that. I figure that if I fake it enough and if people actually believe that I am fine and happy and doing well that eventually I will actually start to feel that way. Plus, I always feel guilty about complaining and moping and whatnot.

In other news..... Star Wars: Legacy of the Force - Inferno comes out tomorrow and I am absolutely thrilled about it. Plus David Levithan's new book comes out.... I have an ARC copy of it, but I think I just might buy a copy of it. Plus I might treat myself to a book or two of Maureen Johnson's. Yes, to cheer myself up, I buy books. I might even buy Twilight by Stephanie Meyer cause I have been wanting to read it and it is becoming a phenomenon and I should probably read it at some point.

It has become obvious that I am not a huge fan of literary theory and/or criticism. I really enjoy literature and I enjoy reading it and thinking about it but all of the formal intellectual stuff just doesn't do it for me. I think I will probably go to Grad school for Information and Library Sciences and focus on Teen Services.

So today is like, what, the fourth day of classes and I have already had so much work. I have written a three page paper on responding to an essay about what makes a classic "classic," I have written a page of self description using active verbs, I wrote a page about powerful imagery in The Handmaid's Tale and what makes it so powerful. I have read 30 pages of American Queer: Now and Then on the naming and classifications of queers, I have read 70 pages of The Woman Warrior by Maxine Hong Kingston, I have read around 50 pages of The Oxford Guide to Literary Theory and Criticism, read a 15 page essay on T.S. Eliot and classifying works as classic, read the section on imagery in Imaginative Writing.

I still need to read Faust and more of the other books, as well as create a powerpoint presentation on Heine and his poetry.

I now know that is it is kind of silly to take three Lit classes, a creative writing class, and a sociology class. But I think I can handle it.  But encouragement is always appreciated (whether it is just words or presents or whatever)

Off to continue reading some.

I need to take pictures of people. Anyone want to volunteer?

By the end of this year I am going to have calves and legs made of pure sex, or awesome, or any other great adjective that you want to add in that spot.

I have to walk up some huge hills to get to/from campus to my apartment. I am trying to walk as much as possible because a) legs of sex would be great and b) saving money on gas would be great as well.

Classes start today. I am excited about them but also sort of dreading the whole "First Day of Class, Forced Socialization and Familiarizing" but at least that should be over fairly soon.

I have a nice apartment, there was much drama involved with moving in and whatnot but things have been worked out and it all seems fine now so that is good.

I hate it when you let someone borrow something and they do not take good care of it. It seems like they should have more respect for property that doesn't belong to them.

I think that Intro to Creative Writing is going to be tough/good for me. I am reluctant to let others read work that I have written, so being forced to do that will probably be very beneficial.

I think I am too nice for my own good at times. Thoma(s) needed a place to stay so he moved into my apartment with me for a couple of days. But now he is gone and it is sort of tough to deal with all of that again. But I am single and I will be fine. I don't really know if I want to look, or even place myself in a position, to date. I guess I will figure that out sometime.

I hate boys.


That was nice while it lasted.


I want to be left alone, but I also hate being alone.

It wouldn't hurt so badly, but I care so much and wanted it to work out so much.

I just want to stop existing. It hurts.

I could probably have my arm chewed off by like rabid alligators and it wouldn't hurt as much as this does.